I went to see a psychologist with Mom and Julia. We went up to the [neighbor]'s house—to where their house would be—we went up to their door and just walked in. I felt so weird doing that, but I figured Mom had gotten the ok at some point beforehand. It was a mcmansion type house. Right when you walked in there was a staircase. The psychologist's granddaughter (probably) walked past and ignored us in the foyer.

We went into this room that was all beige and had a sunken center. An old guy was there. He invited us in and told us to sit down. He was the psychologist. He asked us to watch a little movie clip first. It was of a bus moving across the screen kinda up and down. A futuristic bus. It was really shitty for a blockbuster (which it was, apparently) or some high budget film. I thought that was strange. I wondered why he wanted us to watch it.

After that, I was asked to explain why I was there. I started talking about internet echo chambers and other things. The psychologist seemed amused with my insights. Dad was there too now. He was on the couch with us.

The man had me fill out a form. He projected it onto the big screen we'd watched the movie clip on. One of the questions was about drug/alcohol intake. I said I didn't do anything, but the question seemed to be asking about family too. There were options like “witnessed: mild,” “witnessed: moderate,” “witnessed: authorities involved,” etc. I didn't know which of those to choose and also I felt weird because Dad was right there while I was choosing.

At some point in the dream, I took pictures of a spider and sent them to Dad. He wanted to set one as his background and requested my help, but I was busy. With the psychologist? I don't know. Eventually, I did help him center a photo as his wallpaper.

I was sitting on the couch by Julia showing her this vinyl Hello Kitty bag. I said to her, “this is my comfort item.” Then I said we should go to New York, to go to the Hello Kitty store. I was half joking, but I did want to go. It was too late in the day, though.

I texted Owen to see if he wanted to drive there tomorrow. I said it was only a two hour drive (it was). In response, I got a text message telling me he'd died. I texted back “NO”. I didn't know how else to respond. The person continued saying stuff. I asked who it was and they said their name was “Imael” or something that started with an i. Owen had overdosed or something and this other guy was pretty fucked up too, waiting for his own death it seemed. I was still in shock and denial but it was hitting me. I called the police to have someone go to his house and check.

I got one of those robot answers, where I had to press buttons for what my call was about. I didn't have the time for that. Mom and Charlie and Julia were waiting for me to leave my room to go somewhere together. I pressed 1 twice and the machine told me that wasn't a valid input. I pressed 1 once and it put me through. I told the operator what had happened with the text and that that was all I knew and that I wanted someone to go check on him.

The operator didn't seem phased or react to my emotion at all. He started saying stuff about how after we die, we think we're gonna go to heaven, but then a lot of us go to hell. He was referring to the “Imael” guy, because Imael had said something to me about how he was now “waiting for it to be his turn,” so the operator was like dissing him for desiring that peaceful exit. But he was also insulting Owen, which was in turn rude to me, and I don't know if he realized that.

The operator took so long, but eventually he said he'd send people out to check. I began feeling more awake after that, but I tried to stay asleep because I wanted to know whether Owen was alive or dead. I couldn't hold on though and I woke up.

This girl on the chubbier side, quiet and innocuous, adjusted these two metal bracelets on her wrist then went up a staircase into a school in NYC. The staircase had a roof, but was still exposed to the outdoors from the sides. I went up the staircase after her and passed Kallie [last name], who was on her way out. Kallie looked really cute. Her shirt was cute. I was wearing an ugly polo shirt that made me look all frumpy and shapeless. We said hi to each other as we passed.

Then I was inside the building with the chubby girl and Kallie, who had come back. I was in a bad, impulsive mood because of my ugly shirt. The three of us were in a stairwell with windows that overlooked a classroom on the lower floor. I went over to one of the windows and flashed the class below. Kallie and I laughed really hard at that which put me in a good mood.

Then the other chick pulled a gun out like she was going to shoot up the school. Alex was one of the people she was targeting, though it seemed to me like they were friends before this. Alex was managing to avoid the girl's attacks while also acting relatively unbothered and unemotional.

At some point, the girl was successfully restrained and it seemed like the ordeal was over, but I knew it wasn't. Somehow I had the knowledge that it was going to be the worst school shooting in history, and not many people (if anyone) had died yet. I don't remember how she broke free, but she did.

I remember running around carrying a gun myself, trying to help but I wasn't helping very much because I had awful gun safety and everyone kept yelling at me to take my finger off the trigger while not shooting, etc.

Toward the end of the dream, I was watching from a distance as the girl pursued Alex more, and I turned to Kallie and said, “you know we're next? We're her next two closest friends after Alex.” We decided then to run out of the building and get as far away as possible, to some place the girl couldn't find us. I ran out the door into the street and over towards an area like how it looks outside the NYC ballet building. There were these dancers in the square doing some cultural dance. I ran through them and away.

I was with Julia in the living room. We heard a phone ringing but couldn't find it. It was Julia's phone. We somehow had accidentally called Mom on it. We could hear her talking. She told us some girl was coming over to learn how to take care of Lola, since we were going to go out of town soon. We still couldn't find Julia's phone. I got up and went to the kitchen. I turned off the light on accident but then I couldn't turn it back on. I couldn't turn on any light. So I went back to the living room.

Then Julia and I went up to the window and looked out at the backyard. Lola was sitting underneath the tree by Custard's grave. The backyard was much steeper and there was a rocky cliff rising out of the ground in the back. It looked like a zoo exhibit. Julia and I watched her from behind the glass window, which made it feel even more like a zoo. I told Julia that and she agreed. She started moving her hand across the glass which I noticed was smearing it so I asked her to stop. Then Lola flew up into the air and over the back cliff, over to where the cornfield would be, beyond where we could see her. In my pajamas, I ran outside after her.

I was at the house with Kai but it was the Minneapolis house. None of the other roommates were home. I was doing my fourier homework. He came over to me and I asked him if he'd ever done anything with the heat equation. He said no, which made me feel like I was being pretentious, even though I genuinely did think some of his work must've had something to do with it at some point.

I was planning on studying all day, but since it was a nice day we decided to go out somewhere instead. Before we had time to leave though, the doorbell rang. I opened it and Mr. [neighbor], T, and M were standing there. They started accusing me of things and telling me they were going to go to the police. They told me that they knew I watched T out the window and creeped on him and walked around the neighborhood at night being creepy, and other things too that I can't remember. I was in such disbelief, I took out my phone and started recording so when I told people about it they'd believe me that it even happened.

I kept saying that I never leave the house, there's literally no way that I'm creeping around the neighborhood at night. I didn't even know where to begin refuting being a creep to T since it just wasn't true. I had no idea where they were getting those ideas. No matter what I said they kept yelling at me and accusing me. I was getting really frustrated at that point and didn't know what to say. I confessed to Mr. [neighbor] [something embarassing]—“so what kind of person does that make me?” I said. This seemed to change his mind a bit since it was such an embarrassing thing to admit and also flattered him.

Then they were in the house around the kitchen and table. They'd mellowed out as much as possible and were just loitering. I went upstairs to change because I had a really strange outfit on. I was wearing two pairs of pants (one khaki and one kinda baggy) and a plaid skirt over that. Eventually the [neighbors] left, I don't know if they were still mad at me or not.

I went over to the porch and a bunch of my relatives were there. Obscure ones from the extended family on Mom's side. There were also ones from Dad's side too. A guy was cooking some fish in a big rectangular pot. He was stirring it. It was some Sicilian meal. It was fish with red peppers and stuff in the broth. The guy handed some to Grandma Sandy and me to try. He was in a really jokey mode. Some of Dad's relatives were starting to get a grill going too.

I looked over at the [neighbor]'s house and saw Joe Giudice standing around with some of the kids. They were having a cookout too. Pops had this disappointed look on his face like we should go make amends and join them, because that's what neighbors do.

Dreampt that I was at Prof. Hejhal's office hours over zoom. He was lecturing at a blackboard. One of the students, who I'd never seen before but figured just didn't come to class, pulled out a bong and took a rip. Professor noticed and came over to his camera. He jokingly griped about how he now had to report the kid and jokingly scolded him for “making his job harder”.

Jordyn asked me where she should park her car and I told her the cul-de-sac would be good. Then we saw Forbes and his dad and brother walking to their car, which was also parked in the cul-de-sac. It was not parked well, not flush to the curb at all. The dad pointed out how poorly it was parked and, to Jordyn, I made a comment about it, a joke.

I was waiting in line at a station for a train. The “station” was more like a bus stop. When the train came, all of the passengers got off, even the ones whose stop it wasn't. They had to get off then get back on at each stop, it was the policy of the train. As I waited in the line I watched a guy steal money from someone's pocket in front of me. Then he came over to me and tried to steal my ticket and money. I wouldn't let him, but he did end up stealing a receipt from me.

Then I was in a cafeteria. I was standing in line again, this time around a big circular food serving station—like the typical cafeteria thing with the glass and workers on the other side, you'd tell them what you wanted and they'd give it to you. I was talking to the guy behind me. His demeanor was like Armin from Attack on Titan. We were laughing about this guy who'd gotten fired from his job at the cafeteria for jacking off at work. It was the same guy that had tried to steal from me at the train station.

I was caught up in our conversation and forgot to order, so I had to get whatever was being served at the very end of the selection. It was this strange blob with what looked like cream cheese inside of it oozing out. It looked disgusting. I looked down the line and almost everyone else had gotten the first food option they offered. Kinda strange. The cashier was Patti Stanger. She complimented me on my credit card.

Inside of a house, I don't know whose house. I heard someone listening to a song by Yes in the other room. It was a song off “Going for the One.” I got so excited, I ran in to ask if they liked Yes. It was a guy kinda like Alex Bowen, that archetype of guy. He reciprocated my energy but in a way that was kinda overbearing, like roughhousing with me a bit. We went downstairs and I think Mom was there and I was embarrassed with how he was being to me in front of her.

Dante and I were both laughing and looking in a camera or mirror making faces. We both had really bad skin. Either before or after this, I was with Dante and Grandpa and Joey at a movie theater. We were attempting to line up in a bell curve order of height.

I was walking with Bryce. We were walking Lola. We walked past this “water playground.” It was a kids playground with high tech water features. Soon after, we were indoors in this community center place. I noted to Bryce that the place was new, I'd never been there before, “they must've just built it.” I asked a young girl there if it was new and she said yes, very.

Then I was at the house. I was outside and I saw Luke and Ava playing catch or doing something in front of his house. I called over to them and said something kinda aggressive. I asked if they were back together and said something about it working so well last time, or something about [probably shouldn't say this lol]. Ava started yelling back at me, but I went inside. There was a man sitting on my porch. He had a big nose and was my age or a bit older. I passed him and didn't say anything. He was on his phone. It was raining outside.

Inside I asked Mom about him. She explained that he'd been assigned to monitor this area of the neighborhood. She said something about him monitoring college students specifically and I became worried that he could get me kicked out because he saw me yelling at Ava and Luke.

I was swimming at the cabin and it was night. There were lots of people in the water beside me. I dropped a Switch controller in the water and didn't notice it for a long time. Somehow it didn't sink and Julia got it. I swam out far. I got to this place, tropical with unnatural colors. Like the Lost Kingdom in Odyssey. There was another girl there. It wasn't night anymore but it also wasn't daytime. The lake continued on in paths to my right and left, but the area I was in was shallow and close to the shore on both sides. The other girl swam across to the other side of this area. I wanted to follow her, but I didn't want to swim anymore. I hoped that I'd be able to just wade over. But I couldn't. Eventually the water was too deep and I had to get fully submerged.

On the other side there was a room. The walls and floor were white. In the room I received a gift, a prize for making it to the room. The other girl got a gift too, and so did another girl there. It was a pretty white vase with a kind of blue and red Grecian design. Us three girls each got the same vase but in different shapes. Mine didn't have a handle, but it had a cool spout.

I was at a perfume store with all these fancy perfumes lining the wall up to the cash register. I asked Lisa Vanderpump, who was my age and was there with me, to pick out a perfume she thought I'd like, just for fun. I don't remember what kind she picked for me, it was either in the shape of a little man figurine or something gold and sparkly. I had a paper bag in my hand with tissue paper in it and 2 items from the store. But I didn't want the items or the bag and I didn't want to be thought of as a thief. I asked the cashier where the two items went so I could put them back. He said the first item was from “leopard” (or some section name that started with an L) and the second was in some other section.

I went over to the section where the first item belonged—this item was a little figurine of a man. The shelves were all barren with nothing in stock, like a really shitty, sold-out Dollar Tree. There were these tubs on the shelves that items were to go in. There was nothing in any of them. Maybe a piece of lint here and there. I put the small man figurine into a random empty shelf bucket since nothing was labeled. The rest of the store was really shitty and weird too. They sold all these novelty shirts. I saw a onesie with something about Palestine and Israel written on it. It was light blue and had teddy bear ears.

A couple guys walked past me wearing dresses. I went in the direction they came from and entered a new section of the store where they sold kilts. They had a sign up that said “top kilt seller in the area” or something like that. It was a go to spot for kilts. I put the second object away over here, it was a tartan beige thing. But I don't think it was a kilt or skirt. I don't know what it was. I passed some people sitting on a low bench and said something to them or they said something to me. We had a nice short talk. As I was leaving, they asked me about my coat. I wasn't sure if they were still talking to me, so it took a slightly awkward amount of time for me to answer. I confessed to them that I thought my coat was a little weird, but I still liked it because “it makes me feel like Josie from Twin Peaks.” A woman in the group nodded and seemed to know what I meant.

Then I left the store. I said goodbye and thank you to the cashier from a distance, but I wasn't sure if he heard me. I was worried that he might've thought I didn't say goodbye. Outside, I saw Mom and Grandma sitting at an outdoor cafe table, waiting for me. There was a girl loudly throwing up on the sidewalk by them. While throwing up she was also dragging a piece of chalk across the cafe's side, writing something on the wall. The store next door to the cafe had a sign up about horses suffering somehow. A sign to spread awareness about horses being forced to eat horse meat or something and suffering.

I was driving with Mom and Charlie in New York. We were trying to get back to New Jersey but we were lost. Somehow I got out of the vehicle, but I wasn't far behind and I figured I'd just catch up or something. It was weird. Or I figured they'd come back for me. I had all this tape and a glue gun and I started making little items, like paper mache kind of. Specifically, I wanted to make little durable things that said “Hi” on them, and I wanted to drop them from a height onto the street and watch people pick them up.

A guy came over to me and was interested in what I was doing. I gave him some materials and we both made items. I was trying to make a “thumbs up,” but the materials were sparse now. Just scraps, so it was difficult. I told the guy that before, when I had a glue gun, things were better. It was night by then and Mom and Charlie still weren't back for me. I stood with the man and a couple other people on a sidewalk by a building. A group of guys came over and started harassing us. They stole White Claws from us, which we weren't drinking but holding onto for someone else. For some reason this was a big deal. We negotiated with them to take only 2 of the 4 left. There were 4 guys stealing from us. Only stealing 2 was kind of useless in my opinion, but they took the bargain. I was a little worried through the whole interaction but I felt protected by the people I was with.

I would ride up and down a street lined with these modern houses, not mansions, but obviously very expensive, like little pieces of art. The weather was dreary. The protagonist of the “movie” (the dream was a movie), who might've been a young Nicole Kidman, lived in this cheap house on the block. In the first few scenes, it was just me and her at her house. She asked me to turn off her car in the garage, so I went and turned off the car, or I turned the keys in the ignition to “off,” but it continued to rumble like it was on. The woman came into the garage and realized I'd caused some sort of damage to her car and became really upset about that. Briefly, a group of people including me talked about starting a gofundme to get her car back in order. I saw a bird fly overhead and I recounted to everyone about how I shot a bird down a while ago and had to stitch up its leg. John K. said that the bird (the one that just flew over) was pregnant.

We were all wet (due to rain?) and had to go inside the house to shower. I stood in my room while waiting for my turn. My room had a small window overlooking the backyard. The window made it seem like a room on a boat. Mica walked past on the sidewalk as we were all going inside. Kourtney Kardashian was there, but she was my age. She had her kids or at least some of them, but they were much younger, like babies or whatever age would be appropriate for someone my age to have.

I just really distinctly remember going up and down the street looking at the neighbors' modern expensive homes, then getting to the sort of shitty split-level that was the protagonist's house—but I liked the protagonist's house. I thought about why the director chose this area and I thought he made a good choice. There was no movie, though. It was just a dream, but it felt movie-like.

There was a machine that told me information about “plank time”' or something, but I had to feed it a quarter to get the info out. I didn't have a quarter, but Greg did, so he gave me a quarter, however before I could get back to the machine to put it in, I saw that information was already being displayed. I looked and saw that Trump had put in a quarter for me. The information display had some visual joke relating to Trump and wasn't actually very informative. I actually felt a bit bad for Trump since it was awkward that he was right there while a joke about him was being displayed.

Then I was walking up the street. Mom was with me and I made a comment about how hot it was, then asked if it was that hot in Rome, because I wanted to go to Rome or something, but the heat was off-putting. We kept walking to this area that was hilly with red rocks. The rocks were kind of crumbly. It was very otherworldly. There were tourists walking around and Charlie and Julia were now with us. Rather than continue walking up these red hills, I decided to go back down and wait for Mom, Char, and Ju at the bottom. I don't know why. So I turned around and went back down the path from which we came. I noticed how worn it was and felt bad about how tourism was destroying its beauty.

I got to this curve in the path that had a big bank of snow on the side and over that there was a small, shallow body of water. I saw a group of young boys go into the water. There were big chunks of ice in it and I worried that they'd hit their heads and die. So I told them about the ice. Even though I warned them, I was still worried that they were going to die, so I tried to help clear the ice from the reservoir, but I was really weak.

On the side of the road with Julia. We wanted to get to the cabin. We were going to walk and meet Amy and them all there, but Julia kept saying that they're making some stop on the way and they won't be there until like an hour after we would be, or something. On the side of the road, I just remember there was an expansive field and... something about Jessie and James from Pokemon and a quiet “main character” or Armin and Mikasa and a MC.

I was talking to Seth Rogan on zoom. He was teaching me something, helping me study. His wife was in the background. It was night and they were getting ready to go to sleep.

Dante and I were laughing and laughing and laughing. We were laughing first at this tweet that Lisa Vanderpump put out, it was this deepfake of Ken. Then there was a deepfake of her where she was this white dog, like Falkor from The Neverending Story. We were laughing SO hard at it. Literally rolling on the floor laughing. Owen was there and we were in my kitchen by the table. Zetus was there too. We discussed getting breakfast. Dante said something super blunt like “nah, let's wait until he (Zetus) leaves, then we'll go.” I wanted hot cheetos for breakfast but that got vetoed by everyone.

I was walking for a long time, just wandering around I guess. One of my shoes would fall off sometimes and I'd keep walking, then decide I didn't actually want to lose the shoe, so I'd go back to get it. I walked to a bus stop. The bus was there. A lady who had walked over at the same time as me ran to the counter to buy a ticket (the bus people were very particular about tickets). I heard her stressfully trying to buy a ticket. I had a ticket, but I couldn't find it. I was outside the bus doors rummaging through my backpack. The bus driver was very nice to me and seemed very on my side. Finally I found the ticket and got on. At some point, for some reason, I had to get off the bus and go onto the highway to get something, maybe one of my shoes again, I can't remember.

I was at a bakery with Amy, Mom, and Julia. They served these fruit desserts like cupcakes with a lot of fruit on them. Mom ordered two items. There was a small table-top sign out, I don't remember what it said. Julia flipped it over and lay it facedown on a table. I stood at the counter for a long time and no one took my order. I learned later that the reason was because they weren't doing business until they found the sign, which they didn't know was flipped upside-down on the table. Ella J. worked there along with other pretty girls from my grade. I was sitting at a table at some point and I saw the Property Brothers. They were at a table between me and the counter, so right in my line of sight if I was to look at the counter, which I was frequently doing to check if the store was back in business yet. I was self conscious that the Property Brothers thought I was staring at them.

Amy told me that Dad and Victoria were going to Tokyo and I got really angry. I wanted to send them the letter I'd written before.

I was at an airport. I saw a moose lying down at one of the gates and I thought that it was sad they were transporting it by plane. It seemed like animal cruelty. I was distracted from the thought by someone handing me an otter. They put the otter in my hands and it was so cute and soft. I held it like a baby. I wanted to bring it over to show Mom, Charlie, and Julia.

There was a river flowing through the airport so I got in the river and went downstream. Along the way, the otter found an eel and was trying to eat it. The eel was stuck in some rocks pretty well, hiding, so I tried to help by pulling it out with my fingers. I was scared it was going to bite me. Eventually the otter got the eel and chomped down on its head so it died. We continued down the river. We passed through a group of kappas that were traveling upstream. It was kinda scary to swim through them.

Then I was on an airplane, we were not supposed to depart yet, but the captain was making announcements saying they decided to leave early or something. I started panicking because I thought they were going to mess up the schedule and get in a plane crash. I went over to the flight attendants and told them how I felt and they just told me to sit back down. I felt like no one was taking the danger seriously. I asked them, “didn't you learn about what happened at Tenerife?” Then the plane started taking off. I was out of my seat, back in the crew area and I felt bad for annoying them so much even though I was still scared we were going to collide with another plane.

I woke up on the ground and it was cold and dark and I didn't know where I was. I was with like three other people. I wasn't sure if we were on ice or not so I was scared to move. I started talking to the group, telling them something--I don't remember. I slowly moved toward one of the guys and put something in his backpack. Then I asked them to help me look for anything related to “phenomenology” because that was what was going to help us get out.

I was able to stand up after a while. A car went by and I got on it, hanging off the side. I pleaded with the driver, Bella Hadid, to save us but she ignored me and was mad at me. She tried to drive in such a way that I'd fall off her car. Since I didn't fall off, she drove me to this area where other people started shooting at me. I got off and ran away.

Julia stole stuff from a mall at night. We were running to the car to get away when I heard the sales people finally catch on that the stuff was stolen, meaning they were going to come and look for us. At that thought I got such a shot of adrenaline that I woke up.

I was in some city with Kate. We were crossing a little pedestrian bridge over a river. I saw a plane overhead. It was turning too much, like it was “chasing its tail.” It lost air and started to fall. I watched as it went down, but the pilots managed to land it safely in the water of the river. I felt so relieved. It was very scary.

I was on a boat or somewhere near water with Nathan K. We were talking about Animal Crossing. He was going to show me something in his game, but we had to hop on these platforms over water to get to the Switch. We hopped around a couple times, then I fell in one time—I didn't jump far enough. Nathan fell in since I did, probably to make me feel better.

Then these people, adults who worked in the area/on the boat or had some type of authority like that, they talked to us. I saw a King Boo off in the distance flying around. I tried pointing it out to everyone, but no one cared or saw it. Then Zoey was there. I had the Boo come over and bite my finger. Then I dangled it in front of people's faces like “look at it!” It hurt when it bit my finger. Still, no one could see it, so I figured I had to have it bite people for them to see it. I asked Zoey if she would let it bite her and she said no. I asked another lady and she said yes, but I can't remember if it bit her or not.

The last thing I remember is that I tore the Boo's arm off, and injured it otherwise somehow, but then I felt immensely guilty and miserable for doing that and I just sat there with it in my lap regretting and hoping it would heal and be ok.