Dead goose under my pillow and they were going to do surgery on it. Or like, Mom resuscitated it. It was from another dimension though, so once it was fixed it just disappeared. It wasn't my goose, it was Jordyn's mom's and she wanted to know where it went. But it was gone, in another dimension because we resuscitated it.

Then I was at a restaurant in the place that was also the hospital for the goose (It was alive again, I guess) and we all got kicked out (there were a bunch of people there in support of the goose) and I met a guy whose last name was [similar first letters to my last name] and I was like “oh! We have almost the same last name!!” We were standing at this table and I was really short. Like I had to stand on my tippy toes to see over the table.

At some point I was walking along this road dragging a stick and writing down everything this woman was saying in the dirt. Kate was walking near me. We were going past this suburbia, hearing the life story of the goose (that's what the lady was telling). I couldn't keep up with the writing though.

At some point I was also at a mall food court and I ran into Catherine, Jim, Cindy, Nick and Pops, only they were young. It was like 2001 or something, Catherine was a baby, and I said something like “time travel~” to them. And I made a joke about how I was going to touch my former self and mess everything up (she was sitting at a table nearby). Then Cindy wanted to take a pic, but the camera had a filter on it that made my biceps look big so I messed around with that. It also had a filter that made my biceps look like pianos. Eventually Mom and I left and wandered around the food court more, which was like global-market esque.

I'm in a kitchen with L. discussing the situation regarding the house and recent dynamics. At some point, I just start telling him I hate him. Not dramatically or yelling, just really passionately and forcefully, like I'm extremely firm on it. But then, after we talk for a while, I begin to feel bad and like I didn't really mean it. Though, there's this conflict because I really did mean it at the time, so I don't renege on it. Throughout our whole conversation I was only wearing a thong, but it wasn't until after the conversation that I began to feel awkward about it. I was emptying the dishwasher and he was just loitering in the kitchen and that's when I began to feel self conscious.

I'm at a mall with Zoey and Trisha Peytas. I keep saying rude things to her, like egging her on. Just being a bully—she wasn't doing anything to deserve it. Anyway, we all get in an elevator together, at which point I start feeling uneasy, like she has a plan to get revenge on me and by getting in the elevator I've put myself in a vulnerable position. Trisha invites me to come with her to the basement. She's forceful in her invitation, and for me to decline would be rude even though we both know it's like an invitation to hell, kind of. We have this back and forth about it, both of us casual but with that tension, then the elevator hits the 2nd floor and Zoey gets off. I'm all nervous and don't think fast enough, so the door closes and I stay on, at which point I begin getting really anxious. The elevator descends more and Trisha starts talking about how her phone is dead and my phone is already dead and I dont have my ID or wallet. Now it really feels like she's punishing me for being rude to her earlier in the dream.

We get to the bottom floor and she gets out, but I'm like “no, I won't go” and before she can force me out of the elevator I close the door and go back up to floor 2. But I have a morbid curiosity about the basement and I'm also worried about her. I'm pretty sure there is some sort of demonic or sex trafficking thing going on down there. So, on the 2nd floor, I look around to try and find someone I know so I can ask them to come get me from the 1st floor if I'm down there too long. Because my plan is to go back to the 1st floor and get Trisha, but I want someone to know where I am. But I can't find anyone I know at the mall anymore. I eventually find Martin and he keeps talking over this guy to give me directions to where Zoey and “my people” are. He tells me they left and are on Long Island.

Despite not having anyone to look after me, I go down to the basement and discover nothing that scary is going on. There's a bunch of Christmas lights leading down this one hallway, and that part is eerie, but other than that it's just like an empty outlet store with a bunch of people dancing around. Nothing overtly demonic or sex trafficky. In the hallway, outside the outlet store and adjacent to the Christmas light hallway, there is a couple wearing black outfits. They warn me and Kate (who is now with me) not to go down the hallway with lights. We ask why, but they won't tell us, so I assume that's where the demonic activity is.

Because I am now bored, I begin hanging from some cable that's up on the wall, like climbing on it and I extend my feet and point them and act like a koala. I'm really flexible in doing this. It's fun for a while. Then we leave and I try to find my bus to go home, but my sense of direction outside is completely thrown off.

Me, Cindy, Mom, and Julia were sitting at the kitchen table. B. was doing something on the stairs, some task that made him leave occasionally and come back. Julia kept making all these jokes and comments about me and B. dating or being in love while B. was nearby. He left to go upstairs quick and I told Julia to stop. I tried to explain why I wanted her to stop and how it was awkward, but she got really upset and defensive about it.

Meeting with my advisor at [community college] to take these final tests so I could graduate. I still had tests in 3 classes left to take. I cheated on one and got exactly 80/100, which I needed to pass. I saw Ben and Kai's scores were a lot higher than mine and it made me sad. The advisor lady told me that my “yugioh” class wasn't going to transfer, despite me knowing that it was going to. There was a weird tension in our conversation. Then over by a big industrial printer, while printing a test for my class, Mom and I couldn't keep track of the papers quick enough and they all fell out of the printer.

After all of this, I was over near these people talking about how I was going to graduate. I was extremely happy about it. Then, I was supposed to go back to this boarding house with the people who I was just talking to, but these British people were barring me from entry. I had a teacup that I wanted to bring to the house, but they didn't want me to. I think they thought it was something else, a weapon maybe. I was like “no look, it's just a teacup. It's my favorite one.” I didn't think they were going to let me in, but eventually they did.

In a room at a hotel, I was telling the story of my stuff getting stolen to all these girls. I felt like I was talking a lot, like I had a lot of attention on me, and I felt shy. I had to keep stopping and starting too, because people would come into the room. Keith Richards was one of the people who came in. I was also eating a ton of peanuts, which a girl commented on and made me feel bad.

Then Zoey and I were at an ice rink, in the area right by the glass between the ice and the stands, pacing around. We were goofing off. Sasha Baron Cohen was the coach of a hockey team which was playing and he kept looking at us. We kept doing silly things when he looked. Like specifically, when he looked we'd take a slow drink of this purple juice we were drinking.

Later in the dream, Zoey and I were both on a swim team. We were trying on swimsuits at a store. Zoey was really good at swimming and I wasn't, despite both of us starting at the same time. Before that, we'd had a bunch of weeks of practice, which I attended, but somehow I'd forgotten what we'd learned.

Last night I dreampt I was at a party and I was dressed really ugly. Wearing a blue skirt and ill fitted black t-shirt and weird shoes. And I went to the upper room of the party and there was a girl sitting on the floor who seemed like she wanted me to ignore her, so I ignored her. Zendeya was sitting on a couch up there and she made a face like “sheesh her outfit is ugly” and I was like “yes I know please help me” so Zendeya offered to give me her outfit, to exchange outfits with me. And she was wearing two pairs of shoes, one pair of these old fad tennis shoes from the 70s and then these big clogs that she stuck the tennis shoes in (I figured she did this because it was so cold out).

Dreampt I got a text from R. inviting me over to his apartment to do cocaine with him and his neighbor.

Dreampt about a “Squid Game”-like game where a guy was in a room with a dog that could talk. The dog seemed normal, but whenever the guy tried to fall asleep, the dog would get viciously angry and want to kill him. Something about sleeping people blinded the dog with rage.

Paulina was helping set up some event for Halloween in a classroom. I wanted to chug a ton of milk. I said I could probably drink more milk than anyone else in the classroom. I went to look for a big glass to drink it out of before the festivities began. I ran into Ben and he was amused by my pursuit. I invited him to come sit by me once the milk drinking began (this was part of the competitive aspect of the Halloween game somehow).

Then it became like a music contest or something. We were in different groups set to perform music. Frank Zappa was in a hot tub and I walked past him and showed him the milk, which was in a wine bottle with a cork. I said, “it's my breast milk” as a joke. The group nearby us played Joe Bataan, “Gypsy Woman”. Someone came over and asked us what movie that film was from and no one could answer. Eventually someone said, “well, it's from 1971,” which was correct. Then I contributed that the main actress in it, whatever the movie was, was also an actress in Licorice Pizza. I began to explain that movie a little bit, but I didn't recommend anyone go see it. I didn't even really want to say the name of the movie, because I knew people were going to ask about it, and the plot was so awkward, so I pretended to be unable to remember.

I poured out some of the milk, but rather than milk it looked like a strawberry smoothie. It was thick. A wasp flew near me. I swatted at it, which caused it to get angry, so it flew around me to the back of my neck. I heard it buzzing, felt it, twitched, then woke up.

I was in a movie theater and I had my hand down my pants or something and kept moving around seats and shit and being in general kind of annoying and bizarre, though not on purpose, and the other patrons definitely thought I was masturbating or something strange, with my hands down my pants and all, and they told me that, which, I was like “no” and they were like “clearly you are,” and I was like “no! it's all been misunderstood!” but I could not really defend myself against their allegations.

I was in Zetus's house. Not his house irl, but this weird cabin he lived in for the dream. I was there with Julia and Mom and he wasn't home. He and I had plans to hang out that day, but I didn't text him to confirm until I'd already shown up, so, really late. He wasn't at his house, so Julia and I were just in his room. I was hanging posters on his wall. Suddenly he burst in, kinda exasperated like how a person is after being outside in the cold for a while and rushing. I said “oh! you're here” and tried to explain why we were in his house. He didn't care at all that we were there and sat down on his bed. His room was sort of arranged like Julia's. I sat on the floor. I began to ask him questions about Tria, that was my reason for coming, because I wanted to get some answers about her from him. I don't know why, but there was a reason.

Eventually somehow it was Tria in the room with me instead of him, or at the same time as him, so I began to ask her some questions too. Before she answered them, she told me enthusiastically how she's now in an open partnership with some guy where the rules are, if they're apart (far, physically) they can see other people, but together they can't. She was saying how she wanted to go abroad, because he was going to be going abroad with the opportunity to see other people. She seemed a bit jealous of that, despite being so happy about their arrangement. She told me he was going to Hawaii, and she was disappointed in that too. I agreed and said “that's not even actually abroad!” but I didn't know what I was saying, just trying to hit the right note with her. It worked. She agreed with me and told me about the floozy he wanted to see in Hawaii. I could envision her on the beach and in the water, and then I was in the water at a swimming pool. I think Zoey might've been there. There were a couple other people, it was a public pool. I was swimming around using a small flat floatation device, kind of like a pool noodle. I lost it in the pool at one point and had to swim around to look for it.

Then Zetus showed up again along with Evan G. I went over to them. They were watching a youtube video on Evan's phone (in the pool, still). The video was this flash animation of two sonic characters going through this house searching for the source of a rhythmic thumping sound, only to find out that the sound came from the heart of the house itself. The video was really creepy despite supposedly being meant for children. I just vividly remember the two characters finally realizing it was the house's heartbreak—one of them does this tic-tac-toe puzzle that spells out “LUV” in the middle vertical column of the board, and that's what tips them off. Then they open this small door and begin pulling at the heart, which is all sticky. The slimy tendons attached to the heart stretch out and I think to myself, “that can't be good for the house. If that's its heart, they're about to pull it out!” There was a song playing over the whole video. I think it was a music video, actually. The characters were acting out the lyrics for the most part, I think. Or something like that. I didn't like it and wanted it to be over the whole time I was watching.

Kendall from Succession was my teacher. I stayed after class. He had a meeting to go to, but he decided to stay after to answer very quick questions from me and two other students. (Although, I didn't really have a question to ask.) I don't know why I lingered. One student started asking a question and he gave one of those “what do you mean ___!” “your-question-is-a-stupid-question” type answers. In a way that sort of cut off the student's response, I asked Kendall which episode we were on (we were watching a show in class, as the material). I was holding a muffin in my hand, eating it. He gave me an answer then took a bite out of the muffin in a way that definitely read as flirty and pushing the envelope between professor and student. He said where we were in the show, then also said there were 9 other episodes that “took place in 1998” that I had to read them to get the whole story. (He said “read” the episodes, I just assumed he'd made a mistake). I said, “that's a lot of episodes” and he said “yeah, that is a lot of episodes for you to have to pretend to watch”—again, kind of flirty and I was like “noo, i'm really gonna watch them!”

I was trying to go over to R.'s apartment, but running late. I was in [town] writing in my diary and I lost track of time. I saw that it was 5:30. I texted R. and told him I'd be running a little late. Time kept passing and I was dicking around and not getting ready. I think I was trying to though. Or, I meant to get ready, but I kept getting distracted so more time just passed. I was so stressed out because I was still in [town] too, so even driving out to him would be like 30 minutes plus waiting for the bus plus the bus ride. I went to text him again to apologize and say I was going to be even later than I expected, but it was hard to find his number on my phone. I had tons of notifications and shit. Basically every time I tried to do something to get ready to see him—to actively move myself toward seeing him—I would get confused or distracted, so it was like I was making it super hard for myself on purpose by accident. I texted him saying I was going to be really, really late and asked if he just wanted to reschedule for Friday. He said Friday wouldn't work for him because he's planning on traveling somewhere. Possibly Wyoming, he said. This made me terribly sad. I imagined it meant he was going to see his girlfriend. Wyoming was just a soft lie, a “possible location” he was considering (but not seriously) going to, to distract from where he really was going to go. So I felt that sadness, and then I woke up.

• Sitting in a car in a parking lot and I hear a cat pawing at the door, so I let it in (reluctantly) and it turns out to be a person. A blonde, tweaker-ish girl. She's friends with Ben, apparently.


• Girl came into the house when I was about to go to the bathroom. I was like naked in the bathroom, idk why, and I also had a skateboard. Then a clown troupe came in too.


• At this therapy place, or daycare center, or somewhere. I worked there, I think. I was walking around (I think with Julia) and we saw Dad. He was working there. He was wearing a weird, uncharacteristic outfit. Not something he would usually wear. We had a bizarre conversation with him which ended in us giving him the finger, but he didn't see. These two women sitting next to him saw though. And we had to explain to them that it wasn't for them and that our dad was weird.